… and then I left my body.
I hadn’t known nothingness before. My senses couldn’t detect anything. If time was here, I didn’t know how much of it came and went. I felt, thought, and imagined nothing about the nothingness.
Then the stillness moved.
The darkness penetrated so deep it became bright, black sunlight. The quiet turned up so loud it rang through me like a chime of tinnitus. I felt so cold I was equally warmed. The scent of burning wood filled up the space as I tasted a thousand chemicals.
Memories of infinite lives and omnipotent knowledge became known to me as I merged with the collective consciousness of all that’s me again. I was nothing but uncountable atoms made of light swimming among the heavens. I was god in pieces.
A little after the beginning, I split my whole self up into umpteenth atomized light beings to experience the magnitude of my creations in various worlds and situations to discover the potential of my self concepts.
The self I had just lived and all other selves were chosen by me. After rebirth, I know this, but my brain will be too infantile to conceptualize my might without belief and guidance. The point of life was for all my selves to find their way back to the whole. If they do not, they will be repeatedly reanimated.
I’d just come from living life on Earth. To further assess the potential of this piece of my whole, I must choose the next human experience for them. In the end, this human being was close to knowing enough to join the whole. The next life must ring of a familiarity, ignite a sense of déjà vu so familiar they’ll feel too bothered about the way things are to do it the way anyone says they should. This will be their greatest personality vice and virtue.
I explore the multitude of my beings on earth to pick the next pair of rentals, two who would challenge this being’s desire to go beyond from early on. In order for them to start their quest earlier, they’ll need the initial opposition rather than nurturing complacency, thus consequently a rebirth. This is what caused this human being’s delay, but they needed the experience in order for this next life to make sense anyway.
I know what will happen in every life, but it’s not about my omnipotence from the heavens. In order for any of me to join my whole self, this piece and all others must go through the experience of themselves. Each fragmented soul must function independently, bring its own hue to the spectrum of the whole god soul, so to speak.
I swim this piece of self towards Earth as their parents finish copulation. After all this time, creation, that is birth itself, is still my favorite part.